So with hearing all about the series 13 reasons why and it being dubbed as “controversial” cause it talks about self harm and teen suicide I felt the need to check it out. I know my high school life sucked, like really really sucked and I did think about both those things when I was in high school. SO I checked out season one and been eagerly awaiting season two so I googled it to see when it was coming out and I came across an article stating that it has been delayed with an interesting bit of info:
“Millions of children watched; the Google search term for how to commit suicide spiked 26 per cent; and there were news reports of children literally taking their own lives after the series was released.”
I find that rather interesting that a show has that much dynamic to cause that much spike, but I guess it’s the old thing of “putting thoughts into ones heads” and that’s essentially what the show did and it no doubt would have had many people sitting around with there parents and never once had that thought in there head however with that show it put the thought in there head. Which lead to a google search and perhaps the final act…
If that’s what surrounds season one I may not be a network exec but I can already see a reason for not having a season three, let alone if a season two actually does get aired or not. I get the reason for the show if they put it out there they would hope that it would spark the conversation about the subject since the subject has been rather “Taboo” and it’s something that people shy away from it’s kinda like mental health that’s also something that people have been shy about talking.
So I much like many of it’s fans are eagerly awaiting the start of season two. but those are my brief thoughts about it… I shall return later…
One of my biggest problems is I get ideas for stories but I have trouble following through with them, I know that’s why I abandoned “House Of Elmer” because I got really deep into it and I really enjoyed writing it then all of a sudden I woke up and was like “Nah I don’t want to write that anymore” I even talked to my girlfriend about it. Who told me if I wasn’t feeling like it then I shouldn’t write about it. It later got placed in a release just to show the world.
I think that’s why I stick with poetry because in short that’s what it is, just short poetry I don’t really have to plan long term and look at a second or third book… I’ve even had ideas for my poetry and you know where they currently are ?… Still floating around in my head making me wonder if I should do them or not..
At times I can write 4-6 bits of poetry a day and as my followers you’ve no doubt seen it, however at times I struggle to get out one or at times my brain feels like mush and I can’t even get one out so I post up just random stuff to let you all have a glimpse into my mind, which honestly I’m surprised I haven’t had anyone leave after getting a look into my mind.
I feel like I struggle with everything including talking and saying what I want to say at times, which is a good thing that I’m not required to do any sort of “press” or “interviews” because I think I would give up on writing or just do it more privately. I don’t really know what .
In fact I struggle daily with the “why did I create a html website ? … Not to mention that I renewed my TLD for another year.. I’m unsure why, it doesn’t get looked at as frequently as this blog.
At times I just like to pour myself out to the blog to a bunch of random strangers plus my girlfriend who does read the blog as well. I would like to say I do it in hopes of getting answers but that’s not really the case, because I don’t get answers.
But that’s enough out of me, for now at least
So here I sit, and post on the site that I said I was walking away from. However as I decided to venture out and walk away from all that I created in order to start the creation process once again. I find myself wondering if that shit was short lived…
Was it ?
Well this time around roaming solo, I have carefully decide what site I should be posting on and one of the sites I’m using is no different than what I use to use, but for my distribution site I’ve gone with a completely different site.. But this is where things may turn out to be short lived, I’m in the middle of creating my first release solo and it asked me for my writing name so I gave it, seeing how my writing name is just a first name… Which isn’t a uncommon ground for artists just to use one name (ya know… Cher, Eminem… etc) So it makes me wonder if it will actually accept it or not, I won’t know until I go to push my book out for distribution.
If it requires a last name then my plans end up being short lived, the reason for that is because I never once thought about using a second name, I chose not to use my real last name either because lets face it when you live in a small town it’s very easy to find you… Not that my last name isn’t easy to come across, but I try to use it as little as possible.
So I don’t know if my idea will be lasting long or very short lived, only time will tell, but I do have a fall back plan… If my plan is short lived and I can’t publish with just one name than I will clearly revert back to this site and go about things as if I never ventured off to do my own thing and I will no doubt close up the other site.
At that point I will resubmit it with the newer distribution but through us.
But anyways that’s all I have to say at this point in time.
I’ve created websites, with html for a number of years and I’m starting to see why people have changed up to wordpress. It’s just easier for everyone. I’ve had two websites I’ve debated about bringing up to date with a old host but I don’t know, one part of me says YES another part of me says, copy and paste works just as easy and I can post it here on wordpress. It’s kind of less stress to deal with, maybe that’s what I will do…
I may not be able to do the domain with things as I would like without paying but after a short time I won’t be renewing them so I might as well make my home elsewhere with the sites and right now wordpress seems like a great place..
Guess I should get started…
So we all know that Christmas is coming. For the last few years I had a thought but haven’t really stepped forward with it because I kept getting stopped in the same tracks. One of the things I thought for my Christmas list was “donation in my name to…..?” but that’s the thing I honestly wouldn’t know where I would want a donation sent. Most people say “do something close to you” well I could do something close to the family like the Canadian Cancer Society since Mom had breast cancer. But I would want something close to me, I think the only thing I could do is a donation to Sick Kids. The reason for that is when I was alot younger than I am now I had a hernia removed and I was in sick kids for that, then I got thinking deeper….
I had the thought of listing suicide hotline, no I never called it myself. But I’m sure many people do call it, but back in high school I did think about committing because of being bullied and harassed but I chose not to. The thing is not many people know that about me, I generally don’t talk about that side of my life to many people. So why are you guys so special ? Well I’m just putting it out there, it’s really your choice to read it or not to read it. I don’t know if people will look down on me for that or look up to me for that, not that it matters. I choose not to tell family about certain aspects of my life because my family seems to be very judgmental about everything so I hide many things from them. Such as the fact that I write speaking of which I took the time today to setup the books page on the site to show everything that I released at some point in time.
So my idea of a donation to something I would like to help, it didn’t happen this year, but I’m going to keep it in mind. I might do my own personal donation to something as my own gift to myself, I haven’t decided fully if I’m going to or not or where but if I do I’ll be sure to talk about it.
Last night was a bad night for myself, had to make a late night trip to the bathroom. Not exactly how I chose to spend my saturday nights when I’m trying to sleep but lets face it things like that do happen. I don’t know if it’s cause I ate something that didn’t agree with me or what it was.
So for the last little while I’ve been making music but that as abruptly stopped and everything I created was pulled from online since I discovered what I was making I couldn’t sell and that’s what I was trying to do, the license said that I could freely distribute but I couldn’t sell anything that I made. Needless to say it bothered me when I found that out since I sunk in a bunch of money into things already. So I’ve done my homework and I’m looking at another program, right now the other program I’m looking into is: Mixcraft 8 Home Studio I would buy it on steam, since I already have a few games on steam that I play and it’s the easiest way for me to buy things through it since I don’t have to worry about serial numbers or anything like that. I’m sure I could no doubt use the software I have it’s just the loops I would have to replace, I might look into that in the near future. Right now I’m just trying to limit what I do just because I know the end of the year can be overwhelming with the holidays. But I decided to setup a paypal.me link so if you’d like to drop me a tip feel free by clicking here
Well that’s all that I have to really share right now, not sure what I’m going to do for the rest of the day.